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1 . Community
2 . Mental health
3 . Mental Health
A possible nervous breakdown
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Posted 6 years ago , 5 users are following .
masha17
masha17
Please help . My cousin , in his early forties , is possibly having
another nervous breakdown . What do you think about the symptoms ? He
didn ’ t sleep for 28h hours at one point . He stopped eating regularly .
When he eats , he doesn ’ t notice what ’ s in the plate ( he could be
chewing cardboard ) . He ’ s not using any drugs , but he ’ s bursting with
energy . For now . I ’ m afraid that there ’ s a deep fall lurking ahead .
Like the last time . He had his first nervous breakdown a couple of
weeks after his child was born . He never wanted a child with the woman
he was with , but has always been a loving and responsible father .
Most importantly , he sees signs everywhere . Everything has a special
meaning . Not only does he see signs , but he ’ s always on the look for
them . Those signs are not religious in nature , but mystical . I did show
him only partially how worried I am , because I don ’ t won ’ t him to cut
me off as he had already done with his parents and sister . He mentioned
that for a period of three hours he contemplated jumping of a roof
( which means that he climbed the roof of a building ! ) .
The only good thing that came out of it is that he left a horrible
25 - year long relationship / marriage . But he did it because of another
sign - he met a woman online , ten days ago , and she is off course the
love of his life . She ’ s got two kids and no place to stay ( her husband
left her and yes that ’ s a sign too ) . They ’ re moving in together .
He hasn ’ t had a job for three years now . The only obligation he had ,
which he always fulfilled , was taking care of his daughter . Otherwise
he lived like a teenager . He has no structure whatsoever and I ’ m really
worried about him .
Apart from the one breakdown 5 years ago , I ’ m not aware of any mental
problems he may have had . He has never had " highs & lows " . Where he sees
signs I see symptoms . Thank you for your opinion !
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gingemac1977
gingemac1977 masha17
Posted 6 years ago
he needs to get to the doctors before he does something he will later
regret , unfortunately you can ' t force him to do this , these signs that
he ' s looking for , sounds a bit like paranoid delusions , the trouble is
when you ' re in a relationship that you ' re not happy with it can send
you a bit that way !! i would suggest seeing how he is after leaving
this relationship and try and get him to see someone :-)
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masha17
masha17 gingemac1977
Posted 6 years ago
Dear Gingemac ,
thank you for your reply ! He ' s already left her . Last night we moved
his stuff . He ' s open to the idea of asking for a professional help . But
it stays an idea .
I found that paranoid disorder is now called the delusional disorder . I
know that the cases are very rare , maybe due to the fact that the
patients are otherwise rational and functional and don ' t think that
they need help .
A part from the delusions concerning the signs he sees everywhere
( mostly about his love life , new partner etc . ) , he seems rational .
That ' s why he thinks that his delusions aren ' t delusions ...
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gingemac1977
gingemac1977 masha17
Posted 6 years ago
well maybe this has all been caused by him being so unhappy in the
relationship he ' s left behind and perhaps this new one might make him
better . i was once in a relationship where i ended up with terrible
anxiety because of that person and it made me really ill , nothing in
comparison to your cousin but it ' s good that he ' s got you to look out
for him . so are we talking like road signs and billboard advertising on
buses and places like that ? he sees these and thinks that they are
signs personally for him ??
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masha17
masha17 gingemac1977
Posted 6 years ago
That too ! The worst thing is that all those commercial messages use the
words like " free yourself " , " live your life " , " be who you are " etc . He
somehow believes that even though they were not put up there for him ,
they are signs because he happened to see them in the right moment .
He ' s worried if he knows what he ' s doing , where he ' s headed etc . A
strangers comes up and asks him for directions and he sees at as a sign
that he does know what he ' s at etc .
I ' m sorry to hear that you had a similar experience . I ' m sure he ' ll
realize that this system of belief he reated was just a cruch for him
to get out of a bad relationship , but in the meantime I ' m affraid he ' ll
make some life changing decisions he may later regret ( liek moving in
with a woman and her two children after meeting her online and knowing
her for a few weeks ) .
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dinky dee
dinky dee masha17
Posted 6 years ago
Don ' t all guys in their 40s go a bit loopy ? it ' s a midlife crisis ha
ha . No joking aside , it sounds like the poor chap needs to get some
help and fast . If he has had a bfreakdown then he is susceptible to
mental health issues & should see a doctor . Is he willing to get some
professional help ? I can understand how difficult it must be to get a
loved one help when they are being diffcult or refusing .
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masha17
masha17 dinky dee
Posted 6 years ago
smile Before actually talking to him I thought so too . Now I only
wished he bought a car he cannot afford and went crusing with a blond
half his age ( I apologze for these unsensitive remarque ) .
I ' ll try to help him get in contact with a centre where they offer free
help to patients who can shose to remain anonymous . I hope he won ' t cut
me off .
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dinky dee
dinky dee masha17
Posted 6 years ago
that ' s good if you have places like that . Nothing like there where I
live , they all statistics to sell on to whoever & discharge you when
feeling sucidal !!
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Lillypad1
Lillypad1 masha17
Posted 6 years ago
Your cousin definately has some mental health issues , but obviously I
am not a doctor or a therapist . I have been under the mental health
team for many years now due to eating disorder , depression and now have
been diagnosed as Borderline personality disorder .
Did he spend time in hospital during his last nervous breakdown ? I ask
because if he is , it ' s probable that has a care coordinator or mental
health nurse . Could you ask if he has heard from them recently . If
you don ' t feel you can get him to see a doctor but that his health / life
is at risk , you can make an appointment on his behalf but I think you
need to make it clear when booking is that the appointment isn ' t for
yourself . He may just need to go on medication or have any medication
he currently takes if any re - evaluated . It is very hard to get help
for somebody who doesn ' t know they need it and it is a big weight on
your shoulders to carry alone . If he tries or threatens to jump off
the roof again or similar , then the correct people need to be called ,
probably the police because they too have a duty of care and if
necessary can detain him under a certain section until he is assessed
properly by a mental health team .
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masha17
masha17 Lillypad1
Posted 6 years ago
Thank you for your kind words . Unfortunately , there ' s no one who is
assigned to his case , even though he spent some time at the hospital
and kept taking antidepressants for quite a long time .
I think there may be a chance that he ' s aware that all of this is a
construct to help him cope with the guilt he feels for leaving his
wife . He needs it still and doesn ' t want anybody to blow up the bubble .
I threading slowly , I don ' t want to be cut off .
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Lillypad1
Lillypad1 masha17
Posted 6 years ago
Do you think your cousin would be open to a visit from his GP or social
services ? If so , it ' s worth a try . He doesn ' t need to know that you
contacted them . In any case , I hope things work out well for you both .
There is support for carers that might be worth a try , you would at
least know you aren ' t alone in this difficult time and there would be
tips on what helps and what doesn ' t .
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masha17
masha17 Lillypad1
Posted 6 years ago
Thanx , I ' ll look it up .
He only engages in conversation if you go along with his ideas and do
not rock the boat . I ' ll try again in a few days .
The fact that he isolated himself from his family and some of the
friends worries me .
I hope it ' s just a phase on his way to getting better .
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Lillypad1
Lillypad1 masha17
Posted 6 years ago
Good luck , hope things go well for you both . Remember to look after
yourself too , being exhausted isn ' t going to help things .
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Aspinan
Aspinan masha17
Posted 6 years ago
Sounds like only a professional can now decide what is best for him as
he ' s clearly not well .
Perhaps get some advise from Mind by giving the m a call or contact
your local NHS mental health team for advise .
if your concerned he ' s unable to make rational decisions for himself or
is showing signs of delusional thinking then you may have to make
certain decisions for him without his concent .
The professional help will be sensitive enough not to suggest your
worried or instigated anything but you also need to get professional
advise as to what to do if anything of course .
Neil
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UK - Ven - medicate
UK - Ven - medicate masha17
Posted 6 years ago
You could notify his GP , at least its on the radar . If they think there
is a risk then they can either high recommend a visit or if they think
he needs some help a short stay in hospital . Its not nice I know but
his safety is paramount . Wish you all the best
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